New York-based artist Cassandra Jenkins has released My Light, My Destroyer, an album that beautifully blends introspection with ethereal sounds. In our latest Q&A, Cassandra shares the inspiration behind the record, the process of creating it, and her songwriting heroes.
TSIY: Brand new record My Light My Destroyer came out last month. How are you with release week when it comes to putting new music out there?
Cassandra Jenkins: Release week is something I haven’t done too many times in my life, so each time it’s drastically different. For my 2021 release, I was experiencing the heart of lockdown in the US– playing songs in my bathtub over Zoom didn’t exactly give the feeling of “release.” So this time is different, I want to be surrounded by friends and loved ones through this time. I want to celebrate and be out in the world! It’s exciting and invigorating. The thing I’m most surprised by is how amazing it feels when people understand what I’m trying to express. I think it’s a surprise because I’ve always felt like a bit of an outsider, and oddball, so having complete strangers resonate with my work is comforting in a lot of ways.
TSIY: It’s a stunning record that is such a kaleidoscope of sounds, sonics and textures. I had read the original sessions were scrapped before we received the songs that make this final record. For you, how do you know when a song is complete?
CJ: A lot of my songwriting process is built on a sort of abstract “knowing.” At a certain point songs start to make sense, and I know it’s done when I can physically play it for someone without feeling a sort of inner cringe when the lyrics or music goes by. Sometimes it gets as far as the stage before I realize I still have work to do. While I was making this record, there were a few times when I thought I was done but something in me had to admit that I knew I had more work to do. It would have been much easier to ignore that nagging feeling, but I have to listen to it.
TSIY: My favourite track from the record was Aurora, IL. Can you please talk us through what inspired this track?
CJ: That’s my favorite track right now too. The storytelling is quite direct in moments– I did, in fact, watch the Andy Shauf bus pull out of the parking lot from my hotel room window. I had covid, I felt awful– so sick, frustrated, and trapped and unmoored at the same time. I had no distractions, I just had to sit with my feelings and my aching body. A friend reminded me that I was in the home of Wayne’s World, and that cheered me up. I watched it and thought about my favorite scenes when Wayne and Garth watch planes fly overhead. The second verse was a mystery for a long time, and it finally clicked when I heard the story about Shatner (Captain Kirke himself) going to space at 90. I love anything that helps me zoom out of my life when my vision starts to narrow, and in that moment I really needed it. Maybe I needed to tap into my inner fearless captain too, I think that’s what a lot of record making is about. Going where no cassandra jenkins has gone before.
TSIY: What was your first introduction to songwriting?
CJ: I have been writing songs for as long as I can remember, but in high school I started going to folk festivals with my family, while also discovering grunge and alternative music, and going to jazz camp. When I was younger, I really separated these experiences with different kinds of music, and it wasn’t until later that I realized they’re all part of the stew. The songs at the folk festivals were often written by adults that I looked up to, and had somewhat conventional folk melodies and structures, and ranged from funny to political to sentimental. Every night after the show, we would all gather around where people would share their latest– that always felt more charged and special to me than the stage performances. I loved hearing musicians playing for each other.
TSIY: If you weren’t a musician/songwriter, what do you think you’d be doing?
CJ: Maybe I’d still be at the flower shop or working at the museum of natural history– those were my last two jobs. It’s not hard for me to imagine myself doing a lot of other things. I love learning, I love being active, and I’m a hard worker. I dare you to hire me!
TSIY: My Light My Destroyer uses different sounds to create layers, including sound bites of people talking. Do you use everyday conversation that you’ve record, or do you try and script what suits the song best?
CJ: It depends - Betelguese is documenting a candid moment, Music?? is too– usually you can tell when I’ve scripted something, like in “Omakase”– I would never want to script something that sounds documentary. I want to be transparent.
TSIY: Who are your 5 songwriting heroes?
CJ: Well this is tough. It depends on the day– I look to different people at different moments in my life. I look up to a lot of poets. Let’s talk about some of the songwriters and poets who inspired this last record – Lucinda Williams, Anne Carson, Tom Petty, Joni Mitchell, Leonard Cohen, Laurie Anderson, Lou Reed, David Berman.
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My Light, My Destroyer is out now via Dead Oceans
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